Wipeout by up2late

Wipeout by up2late

A/N: Entry for The Pineapple Awards: Best of the Worst Lemons

Jake POV

The second I saw Nessa I wanted to get the drop on her. My brain was still speaking surfer from hours before when I had been squeezed into a wetsuit, riding the swell. And now my board was stiff just thinking about riding the Gidget in front of me.

The bed was behind me, dressed in little more than a fitted sheet. Nessa was in front of me, dressed in little more than a fitted tee. She'd shimmied out of her shorts and I could see her round, pink Necco wafer nipples through her shirt. She wasn't wearing a bra. Suddenly my funboard became a longboard.

As she stepped closer to me I couldn't quite decide where I wanted to put my penis. Somewhere hot and warm and there were at least three options in front of me. Leaning in to kiss me, Nessa effectively took away one option. I liked surfing the backdoor but it was a little hard to reach from here, so I'd have to settle for door number two. My penis seemed happy with that. It just wanted to be put somewhere. Hell, it had settled for a Snapple bottle once. Almost anything was better than that. Except for a Coke bottle. Trust me.

Nessa's hands worked my zipper down. I shimmied my butt a little in the only dance move I'd ever learned, managing to slip my jeans and boxers down to my thighs. The riptide that is my hands tore her panties off and I was ready to carve in. My penis bobbed in place, waving hello to its target destination. Luckily my back pants pocket hadn't gone too far, that's where the condom was. Once my longboard was outfitted, I was ready to go.

Poking in, I took Nessa's weight in my arms so I didn't have to lower my pants any further. She lifted off of me, my penis popping out of her. I thrust up, my head just making it in.

Hello again, Vagina, pleasure seeing you again. Oops! Be right back!

And I was out again. Nessa teased me, slipping only low enough to take just an inch in each time.

Peek-a-boo Vagina! Guess who?

Peek-a-boo Vagina! Me again! Penis!

My penis continued to play hide'n'seek with her vagina for at least a minute. That was long enough for me. Sliding one hand up to the back of her shoulders, I pulled her down as I pushed up, finally getting all the way in. That's when she started breathing loudly in my ear. The sound reminded me of something. The ocean.

Tumbling, roaring waves. The sound pulled me under and my penis in its wet suit surfed her vagina. Like the gnarly waves with dangerous undercurrents that hollowed out coves along the coast, my little surfer man had found his own perfect hole.

My crotch was started to chaff and I was immediately thankful that my penis was outfitted properly. The gasps and pants coming from Nessa called to me again and I jacked my penis into the barrel of a wave that was her vagina. Her body crashed and swirled around me and I was caught inside. It only took seconds before, just like earlier today, I wiped out. Spurting and squirting, I was thankful that I didn't get nearly as wet this time as I had in the ocean. Condoms were the best wetsuit ever.

Continuing my instant replay from the beach, my knees buckled and my ass bounced onto the bed behind me. At least it was more comfortable than sand. Laying back, I vaguely felt Nessa roll off of me. Waves rolled over me again and again until finally the sound of the ocean faded away. I turned to look at my beautiful, sweaty girl and could only think of one thing to say.

"Dude, that was bitchin'."

End A/N: Leave me your reviews, let me know what you think! For anyone wondering about The Walmart Saga... it will continue! Thanks!